About

Me.

My name is Debbie Kahng, and I am an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist in California. For several years, I have had the privilege of working with families affected by addiction and alcoholism, and I am deeply passionate about this work. My focus is on supporting families as they seek the peace and healing they need by gaining a deeper understanding of addiction, codependency, and the trauma caused by the family disease of addiction.

I strongly believe that addiction is an intergenerational illness, often fueled by codependency, which gives rise to dysfunctional coping strategies for everyone impacted. It is essential for families to recognize the ways addiction has affected them, as many are unaware that they may carry symptoms of codependency as a result of these transgenerational patterns. My goal is to help families increase awareness, develop healthier coping skills, and begin the process of true healing.

The Horse.

I went to a retreat once and worked with a horse as part of my therapy. My job was to simply walk the horse around the corral. Being the person I am, I wanted the horse to go in a perfect circle, however she did not want to. The equine therapist told me to go around, so went around and continued on with the circle until I came upon the same spot. She did not want to go over there, yet I still tried. I did this same pattern 3 times before the therapist told me, “Debbie, you’re not going to get this 1000lb horse to do what she does not want to do.” And a moment later someone opened the gate and the horse took off.

I, of course, let go of the lead.

My primary therapist was so excited that I had let go, and when I asked her why she was so excited, she had said “Debbie, how many times have you been dragged around in dirt, mud and shards of glass from all the relationships you’ve held on to?” It was in that moment that I had learned the most important lesson of all,

Let go or be Dragged.

It was easy to let go of the 1000lb horses lead, however it is not so easy to let go and let a person you love just BE, when what they are doing to themselves in their addiction is scary. The healthier you are, the stronger you will be able to make wiser decisions for the health of the family as a whole.

Thank you for visiting my site. I look forward to interacting with you.

-Debbie